Responding Positively

ADVANCING MY CHILD’S SELF-ESTEEM

A child’s opinion of himself is built on how others react to him. He is sensitive to adult behaviour — whether an adult responds to him warmly or appears to be disinterested.

Before your child begins using real words or signs, he may try to communicate with you in many other ways: eye contact, pointing, babbling. When you attempt to understand or interpret what he is trying to tell you, you’re letting him know you care. This is like putting money into his (or her) bank of self-esteem. Let’s take one example: During bathtime, when a baby splashes water, he may watch for his mother’s reaction. If she joins in his game by laughing, he’ll get a positive message: You are worthwhile. You are important. I enjoy being with you.

HOW CAN I RESPOND POSITIVELY?

Before my child has “true language”
I can respond positively by —

• Looking at my child and smiling.
• Giving my child a gentle touch or pat.
• Nodding my head and pointing to what my child is trying to talk about (or picking up the object of discussion).
• Imitating my child’s actions, facial expression, and body language.
• Imitating my child’s sounds.

When my child is starting to use “true language,”
I can respond positively by —

• Imitating my child’s words or signs.
• Saying or signing something back to my child about what I think he is trying to tell me (for instance, names of objects or activities).
• Complying with my child’s request or explaining why I must say no.