Modifying your Message
Communicating is like playing on a team: we make adjustments so that everyone can participate.
WHY MODIFY MY MESSAGE?
You probably already know what kinds of messages get the best results when communicating with young children. Which of the following two instructions will Johnny, a two year old, be more likely to understand?
Parent: “Well, I guess we better put all this stuff back, because I have to take Ginny to the doctor and then pick up the pictures over at the supermarket. Okay?”
Parent: “Johnny, clean-up time!”
The first message gives Johnny information about why he needs to clean up and what activities will follow. However, you probably identified the second message as more effective and to the point. In the second message, the parent gets Johnny’s attention and then clearly tells him what is expected.
Let’s look at this from your child’s point of view. When you modify your language to his level of communicating, he understands your message. Equally important, he will think positively about his own attempt to communicate.
HOW CAN I MODIFY THE LENGTH OF MY MESSAGE?
If I want my child to understand what I’m communicating, I can modify my message to suit my child’s level of understanding. No expert tennis player, teaching a beginner, would ever hit the ball as hard as possible — or hit it into the far corners of the court. In the same way, you won’t want to use long sentences when your child still has only one word — or no words — to communicate. A good tennis instructor hits the ball slowly, straight to her student at first. For the beginning player to improve, the instructor must use skills that are only slightly above the beginner’s level.
Similarly, if your child is going to attempt to build sentences, he needs to hear and/or see words that are only a little beyond his current stage of language learning. By modifying the number of words and/or signs you use, you should try always to be just one step above your child’s level, helping him up to your level. Record your child’s language level every few weeks or months, and modify your message length to match.